Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Follicular adventures

Those of you who know me in real life should know that I have been growing out my hair for the past 3 years.

From the beginning, people asked me how long I would grow it, and my answer has always been "until I don't like it anymore."

Well, with the great changes that are happening in my life (going to Germany in 3 months, having an apartment when I get back, usw.), I decided it was time for a change. Since I had gotten to the point where I hardly ever wore it down, I decided that once my hair was long enough to donate to Locks of Love, I would cut it off.

And I did it today.

After the initial shock wore off, I came to the conclusion that it's totally smexy.

Christmas was good. Not much to say there.

Happy new year, everyone! Don't do anything I wouldn't do. ;)


Saturday, December 20, 2008


It's that time of year again - when people come together and make sure their loved ones know just how much they love them. And I have plenty of loved ones, but there's always the reminder that I don't have a 'beloved'.

I hung up my family's stockings today, and other than my 17-month-old niece and me, my whole immediate family is made up of couples: my parents and my three sisters with their respective husbands/fianc├ęs.

And with all my college friends gone home for the holidays, I find myself alone a lot, which makes me fantasize about all the attractive gay guys I know.

Then I realize that I don't especially want to be with any of them. I just want to be with someone. I would gladly date Lip Ring, Flippy Hair, Adam's Apple, the Artist, or Shorty, as they're all attractive, fun, and within an acceptable age range.

But Lip Ring is still in a relationship, which he says he wants out of, but he doesn't do anything about it. So he's out based on Dating Rule #1.

Neither Flippy Hair, Adam's Apple, nor the Artist have ever shown any interest in me, and I'm too chicken shit to make a move after my last attempt at that failed miserably.

And I'm not even completely sure that Shorty is gay. He confuses my gaydar and that of all my friends.

But really, how will I ever find anyone if I wait just for someone else to come to me. Same-sex dating at an unnamed Baptist university with homophobic policies is a real bitch.

I just have to keep up hope and have the courage to try, because if I never try, nothing will ever happen.


Sunday, December 7, 2008

The rules of dating

So, after explaining to Lip Ring for the 3rd (at least) time why we cannot fool around right now, I've decided to write out a definitive set of rules that I follow in the field of dating. I also use these when giving others advice.

1. Absolutely NO CHEATING, and no condonation, advocation, or facilitation thereof.
1a. Cheating is defined as intimate activity, be it physical, emotional, or virtual, with someone who is in a relationship with someone else, without the consent of the person with whom they are in the relationship.
1b. Even if the relationship is on the rocks, it is still cheating until the relationship is officially over.
1c. A relationship is not considered officially over until there is some confirmation from both parties. Both being listed as 'single' on Facebook and/or Myspace is generally sufficient, unless the parties involved are especially untrustworthy, in which case you should not date them anyway.

2. Although spending time with your SO/whatever is important, you should not ignore your friends and spend all your time with your SO/whatever.

3. Keep PDA to a minimum. Hand-holding, hugs, and pecks are sweet and perfectly acceptable; tongue-kissing, neck-sucking, ear-nibbling, groping, usw., are not. Save that for when you are alone. Please note: Even the 'acceptable' activities can become annoying and unacceptable if done too much. (See Rule #2.)

4. Do not make major decisions (e.g. where you live/work/go to school, getting a tatoo) based on your SO/whatever, unless the relationship is well-established, stable, and has lasted at least 9 uninterrupted months, although a year or three is even better.

5. Absolutely NO CHEATING. This one is important enough to be listed twice. Cheating can possibly be forgiven on a case-to-case basis, if much honest and humble pennance is performed by the offender and the offense is never, EVER repeated. Sadly, the statement 'Once a cheater, always a cheater' is true more often than not.

This list may be amended as different things occur to me.


Wednesday, December 3, 2008

My current musical obsession:

Army of Lovers, a Swedish pop group from the late 80s through the mid-to-late 90s, and again in the early 2000s.

They're decadent, glamorous, and their songs are just so damn catchy.

They're campy and sexy.

Of course, they're called a 'Swedish pop group' because that's the common thread between them all. In reality, they're quite diverse:

Alexander Bard - just your average Swedish 'bisexual libertine', who was pretty hot, before he converted to Zoroastrianism and grew a gross beard that makes him look like Father Time.
Jean-Pierre Barda - the Algerian-French-Swedish bisexual Jew, who also makes a living as a hair stylist and a make-up artist for Europe's elite. He likes to wear even skimpier clothing than the ladies of the group.
Camilla 'La Camilla' Henemark - the half-Nigerian, half-Swedish beauty, a diva who left the group for a few years to pursue an unsuccessful solo career before eventually coming back to the group. She likes to wear short dresses that show off her pretty pretty panties and her bountiful bosoms. She also seems to wear crowns in a lot of their music videos. Gee, I wonder why.
Michaela Dornonville de la Cour - the French-Swedish blonde bombshell who came in when La Camilla left, and was subsequently given the boot when Camilla returned.
Dominika Peczynski - the sexy Polish-Russian-Swedish Jewess, who joined during the de la Cour years, but remained after the return of La Camilla.

Sometimes, they can be a bit vulgar, but it's all in the groove.

They continued to evolve, fitting right in when they made their 2001 comeback.

And they just make me feel all sunny inside.